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Daily Archives: August 21, 2011

Flash Fiction #2: Mage’s Folly

Ash continues to fall from the sky as the fires rage on. A storm is approaching, and I heard they can no longer hold the gate. I wonder if this journal will chronicle the final days of the earth.

Jessica put her pen down and rubbed her eyes, glancing at the clock on her cell phone. 3A.M. It was as bright as day.

The city burned. She was one of a few left; those who had magic were ordered to stay behind and guard the gate. She could see it from the window of her hideout. The gate was about four stories tall and charcoal black. With the towering inferno behind it, it might as well have been the Gate to Hell.

The radio beside her reported that the last train of evacuating civilians had been destroyed just outside the city.

Jessica picked up the pen again and wrote one final line before closing the journal and tucking it into her cargo pocket:

I should have asked her earlier.

The door flew open and a woman with short blonde hair burst into the room. “Jess! The gate – it’s open!”

Jessica stood up and removed the safety on her pistol. “Then I suppose we don’t have much time, Nikki.” The woman nodded and they left the building together.

The run to the gate was full of the horrid kind of silence filled with things left unsaid. Jessica had always been an optimist, but lately she had been wondering if you could still have regrets after you die. “Listen, Nikki, there’s something I’ve been meaning to ask you,” she said over the sound of their feet pounding on the pavement.

“There’ll be time for that later. We’re going to get out of here alive.” Nikki reassured her.

“But-” Jessica started, but she was interrupted by the sight of what was pouring out of the gate.

Thousands of demons fled the gate that was now open wide like a hideous, fanged mouth. They were black, and winged, with sharp talons. They flew out in such large numbers that they looked like one massive shadow. Their high-pitched battle cries pierced through the night like a knife and rang in Jessica’s ears.

“Do we run?” Nikki asked.

Jessica nodded. “Most of the mages were at that gate. Think they’re still alive?”

“You’re right,” Nikki said. “We’d be marching to our deaths.”

They sat in silence as the demon horde flew toward them.

“Wait,” Nikki said suddenly. “What about that portal the Corps found earlier? Think it works?”

Jessica brightened. “We don’t have much of a choice but to find out. Let’s make haste.”

They ducked into an alley and moved from one city block to the next in the relative shadow of the buildings, dodging debris and smaller fires that had broken out. Occasionally a dark shape would pass overhead and they would pray in silence that it would not notice them.

At last they reached an unmarked building that had thankfully been untouched by the riots. Jessica tried the lock. “No good.” Her hands glowed with fire and she reached for the lock, but Nikki grabbed her wrists and the flame went out.

Nikki smiled. “You were never one for the delicate approach,” she said, reaching in her pockets for a lock pick. “You’ll draw attention if you try to melt the lock,” she warned as she knelt down and tampered with the lock.

Jessica sighed and waited, keeping watch on the street around them. She heard a click and the door swung open. They crept in, taking care to close the door quietly behind them.

Because of this, they did not see the dark figure landing on the street nearby.

The first thing they noticed was that the building had no power. Jessica held a tiny fire in her palm; it was just enough to see by. The second thing they noticed was that there were a lot of stairs. They descended eight flights of stairs before they reached a heavy door. Jessica pushed it open. She shielded her eyes against the sudden brightness of the portal.

“At least it’s still working,” Nikki said. “Must be powered by a magical source.”

They approached it slowly, and Nikki placed a hand against the swirling energy timidly. Her fingertips pressed against it. “Hmm…” she mused, “must have to be activated from another source.”

They looked around the room until they spotted a small pedestal with what appeared to be a button. “Here goes nothing,” Jessica said, and pressed it. The ground shook and the portal seemed to grow brighter.

At that moment, the door burst open and flew off its hinges. A primal roar echoed across the room. The dark beast stomped toward them. Jessica grabbed her pistol and fired several rounds into it, but it didn’t seem to notice. She shot a burst of flames from her hand instead, but it also ignored her attempts to injure it. In a flash it was upon them, and threw Nikki across the room. The wall cracked with the force of her impact against it. Jessica paled.

The demon lunged at Jessica, but she leapt away just in time to avoid being grabbed. She inched backwards, toward the portal. She looked desperately toward Nikki.

Nikki’s expression would haunt Jessica for the rest of her life. “You go,” Nikki said.

“No.”

The demon approached Jessica menacingly.

“Do it. Maybe you can find someone wherever that portal leads who can help,” Nikki insisted.

“No. I’m not leaving you.”

“I’ll destroy the portal behind you so they can’t follow you. Then I’ll escape, find out where you went, and come after you. Just wait and see. I’m right behind you.”

“NO! I said I’m not leaving you! I love you…”

Nikki stood and shook her head. “I love you too, babe. And that’s why I have faith that you’ll come back with help.”

The demon charged. Nikki was faster. Jessica couldn’t stop Nikki from shoving her into the portal. The last thing she saw was a tear running down Nikki’s cheek as she blasted the portal’s control panel with her own bright orange energy.

Jessica landed roughly on a patch of soft grass. She appeared to be in a park. The sun shone in a bright blue sky. She could see skyscrapers, and trees, and cars, and people. She sat on the grass and waited for Nikki to come through the portal behind her.

She waited forever.

 
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Posted by on August 21, 2011 in Uncategorized

 

Fun With Spambots

As a general rule, AIM is terrible. It lacks security, the interface is outdated, and no one knows what a good screen name is. (Hint: iluvb00bs91 is terrible.)

And despite making my settings very, very private, I still get robots trying to get me to have cybersex with them.

Sometimes, I feel compelled to troll them.

(Disclaimer: This conversation is crude in places and is not recommended for younger audiences. Move along, please.)

Spambot 4:39 pm
how’s it going? havent talked to you in awhile.. lol

D.C. Andrews 4:39 pm
Does “in a while” mean “never”?

Spambot 4:39 pm
do you remember me?.., it’s Stephanie.

D.C. Andrews 4:40 pm
Last name?

Spambot 4:40 pm
Stephanie

D.C. Andrews 4:40 pm
Your name is Stephanie Stephanie? That’s unfortunate.

Spambot 4:41 pm
Stephanie

D.C. Andrews 4:41 pm
I don’t even know how to respond to this.

D.C. Andrews 4:43 pm
My name is Elizabeth R. Kennedy II. I wish I had more time to talk, but I am about to climb into my space shuttle that will take me to the moon for the ultimate goal of starting a colony. The human race needs to expand – and the universe will be our playground!

Spambot 4:44 pm
i wish i could put you face in between my tits!

D.C. Andrews 4:44 pm
Should I die, I would like to give you my life savings of $10,000,000,952.03

Spambot 4:44 pm
not much here just got out of the shower went to the gym today :)

D.C. Andrews 4:45 pm
Are you fat.
Only fat people and celebrities go to gyms.

Spambot 4:45 pm
i gotta question do you like a girl with big tits? or do you prefer a girl with a fat ass..

D.C. Andrews 4:46 pm
If I say one that you don’t have, will you change into one like a Ditto?

Spambot 4:48 pm
im loading my cam now :)

D.C. Andrews 4:48 pm
My daddy said he’s loading his rifle.
We’ll see who finishes first.

D.C. Andrews 4:50 pm
You said you were going to show me your penis. :/
I’m calling the cops.

Spambot 4:50 pm
you cumming? im really wet ;x
hahaha!  call em! and tell them you are reporting a felony…  YOUR MULLET!!  You might wanna get that looked at!

D.C. Andrews 4:51 pm
Did you learn that in college back in the 80′s?

Spambot 4:51 pm
let me know when you’re in babe..

D.C. Andrews 4:52 pm
You’re too ugly. :/
I’m sure even virtual connections would give me 18 STDs and cancer.

Spambot 4:52 pm
k

Spambot 4:54 pm
ofcourse babe, just need to verify age but yes its free
you in yet?

D.C. Andrews 4:56 pm
That’s what she said.

After this, I was blocked.

 
1 Comment

Posted by on August 21, 2011 in Uncategorized

 
 
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